Great Expectations

After a review session for an upcoming Japanese final my freshman year of college, three classmates and I decided to blow off some steam at the rope swing. Basically, you'd climb up a tree, swing out on the rope and jump into the Connecticut River. For obvious reasons, the rope swing no longer exists.

As we cheered each other on, we borrowed (and butchered) a Japanese expression: hazu. As we understood it, hazu had a strong meaning. If you said something was hazu, it meant that that thing was so expected that it was almost as if it had already been accomplished. "You're hazu there" we cried, and just as expected, we each took our turns despite any fears we may have harbored.

My return to Bikram this past week has me thinking about hazu. When I took my first Bikram class in over two years just a week and half ago, it was great. Only after class was over did it strike me that it had gone better that it ever had before. I credited my newfound ability to get into certain postures not only with increased fitness, but also with the fact that I had simply forgotten what I had been unable to do before. I had forgotten my mental blocks.

Perhaps not surprisingly, in remembering my former demons, I resuscitated them. I remembered that certain poses, Padangustasana (toe stand) and Ustrasana (camel), in particular, make me truly anxious. Getting into toe stand requires falling forward and camel requires bending backwards in a position that leaves the front of your body very vulnerable.

It would be one thing if I couldn't accomplish these postures, but I know I can do them (maybe not well, but still). I did them not even two weeks ago. This week, though, my old habits resurfaced. I allowed myself to panic and, ultimately, fail.

It may be easier said than done, but if I'm going to get this right, I need to stop hazuing failure and expect success.

I'll keep you posted.

-Gym Belle-

Things I Heart About Lulu

I have vague memories of cruising the Equinox stores hunting for cute gym clothes that wouldn't break the bank. Sometimes I'd find stuff, but often I wouldn't. Even when I did, I doubted that my purchases were truly worth it.

I resisted Lululemon at first. Yes, the outfits were cute, but they were expensive. And everyone was wearing them. Then I bought my first. It was the length of the top that appealed to me. I'm not even 5' tall, but somehow gym tops always shrink and ride up. Years later, this one is still the perfect length.

That's another thing. I still have my first Lulu outfit. It even survived the Equinox laundry system for a year (story for another day).

These days, I buy most of my Lululemon at the third avenue store. It's a happy place. The staff are all super sweet and helpful and they seem genuinely interested in what you'll be doing in your purchases. You know that super cheesy "New Yorkers are awesome" feeling you get when you're running the loop (or whatever) in Central Park and you see so many people out doing their thing? I get that there.

My Lulu outfits are exactly the right level of cute (unlike the uber girly Stella McCartney shorts I'm wearing right now because everything else is in the laundry... they were a gift.) In fact, since the office was technically closed yesterday, I wore one to work. At 4am (sad, but true), I was so happy to be in my Lulu. Nothing else would have still been that comfortable.

Final word on the subject: matching headbands. These people so get me.

-Gym Belle-

Now That Was Hot

For those outside NYC, lately it's like Forks without the cute vampires, and the daily rain is seriously putting a damper on my running the park. I needed something else to commit to to get myself out of bed this morning. Early morning classes (meaning 6, 6:15 or 6:30) are surprisingly lacking on the upper east. I have serious respect for people who can take a 7:30 class and get to work by 9:00 or 9:30. I just can't. I have a dog. I need to flatiron. It's not possible.

I remembered that Bikram Yoga NYC on 83rd offers 6am classes a few times a week, including Wednesdays. At 11 last night, this sounded like an awesome idea. I signed up.

I did a Bikram stint in '06 when a good friend got really into it. I went about twice a week for a few months. Then one day, a couple of hours after class, I came down with a fever. While I never officially blamed the class for the bug, I also never went back. It may also have had to do with this guy who I had briefly dated who I didn't want to run into in class. Regardless, I fell out of the routine.

I was only the second person to sign up last night, so I was surprised to walk into a packed room this morning. Luckily, the back corner spot was open. In most classes, I like to be right up front. With yoga though, and especially Bikram, the chances of me falling down or otherwise embarrassing myself are high enough that I prefer to hide.

The class was awesome. Enough of the poses came back to me that I didn't feel like a total newbie, even after the two and half year hiatus. In fact, two and half years was enough time for me to forget that I'd had hangups about some of the positions, so I was just able to get into them this morning. The spot I chose ended up working out well because it was by the window - but I didn't manage to hide. The instructor was the girl who had checked me in at the reception desk, and she'd learned my name. She was fantastic and literally talked me into a position I'd never gotten into before.

Could this become part of my routine again? I'll keep you posted.

-Gym Belle-